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Having masturbated to pornographic material for two decades, I believe I have earned the title of “porn connoisseur.” I’ve been seeing these things since I was (drafted)and I spend practically all the masturbations session ogling naked bodies on a screen. I’m addicted, you could say, if you were a objectively incorrect fan.
We all know that I have a picky vagina, but I’m going to go ahead and say that I also have picky eyes and ears, so pornographyI mean, specifically. (My musical taste is up for debate.) If I get high and reflect on the sheer volume of pornography I have consumed in my life, I really makes me tripman. I have witnessed the disgusting and the angelictea subversive and the formulatedtea transcendental and the repulsive.
Most porn is mediocre. Uninspired. Forgettable. But I know exceptional when I see it.
What will I do with this great power? I thought it was time for a new blog series, in which I share porn gems I’ve unearthed. Scenes that literally left me speechless. Scenes that made me fight to avoid orgasm. Porn is sure to irritate me…and maybe you too?
Like a chef preparing a five-course dinner, I’m here to present you with a distinguished selection of porn for you to try. Enjoy your food.
Dude. Dude. DUDE. Those are the words I had to refrain from texting my friend. Billy Lore after devouring this scene with your IRL partner David Darkholme. It is absolute perfection, from start to finish.
One might ask, “Isn’t it strange to masturbate to sex porn?” your friends?” But for me that ship has sailed a long time ago. I mean… how else can I see the work they’ve been doing? And how good are they at that? And remember that time I made out with them in a hotel room during a conference?
The chemistry between Billy and Dee is fascinating. Dee submits to Billy, moaning helplessly under his touch and breathlessly begging for every orgasm. Billy’s type of domination is playful, even joyful, completely him. All smiles and teasing. They kiss, Dee. grinding against Billy’s leg through his jeans. Billy jokes, “you’re so fucking desperate.”
The Jeans Are Off: Billy quips, “Were those pesky jeans in the way?” – and they suck each other’s cocks. Passionately. Correctly. Their bodies are in sync, hungry for each other. Fingers deep inside Dee, Billy watches, “You’re getting tight…are you close? You’re going to ask first, right?”
“Promise, promise.”
“That’s a good boy.”
They kiss, Dee rubbing insatiably against Billy’s leg through his jeans. Billy jokes, “you’re so fucking desperate.”
Dee becomes so insatiable that they bend Billy over to his hands and knees and start criticizing him. No toys, just slamming her genitals against his, the skin between them slapping with each thrust. It’s unreal. “Fuck, I can feel you inside me,” Billy moans. Dee gives in to her primal instincts and uses Billy for her own pleasure, and it’s incredible to watch. Dee has another body-shaking, all-consuming orgasm.
When sex toys come out, it is a series of legends. Duh. Dee inserts the Flounder and straps on the sexy cheeky strapon. His cock is epic. OutlawAnd guess what suddenly appears in Billy’s hand? HAS Rechargeable magic wand.
The scene ends with them delirious, drunk on orgasms, and I drunk on something else. Euphoria? Validation? Inspiration? Watching the way Dee and Billy turned each other on, their limitless inventiveness, blew me away. This is the strangest queer porn. I feel privileged to have seen it.
Was excruciatingI’m telling you, trying to pick just one. cocky boys Scene from the first installment of this series. But I decided to start with galán Calvin Banksthe gay boy I like.1 This man is my definition of a golden god: tousled curly hair, expert-level sexual skills, deliciously moody energy, and oh my god, the words that come out of his mouth. “Hit that ass, it’s all yours.” “Your ass is so tight, baby, I can feel you clenching.” Hmm. Sweet and dirty.
As part of the Camp CockyBoys series, this scene between Calvin Banks and joseph moore was filmed outdoors during a summer model gathering to celebrate the site’s 10th anniversary. It feels special and intimate, with the natural light from the stone fireplace casting shadows on the men, all romantic as a Taylor Swift video. They stare at each other. Calvin rests his fingers under Josh’s chin as he kisses him. Fire is both literal and figurative.
Realization: blowjobs are just better in the context of a fire. Bodies create silhouettes. The grill shines. There is some mystery. And there’s Calvin, swallowing Josh’s entire cock like it’s the easiest thing in the world. “Woww,” moans Josh, amazed, a representative of the audience. Her growing British voice belies her submissive side.
Realization: blowjobs are just better in the context of a fire.
This is a “fuck“, as they call it, where the guys fuck each other. Josh and Calvin seamlessly switch between top and bottom, clearly enjoying both roles. They also contort in some wild sexual positions. Bodily feats in porn often feel smug and mechanical, but these two are completely invested the entire time, lost in each other and the pleasure they’re creating together. It’s a bit like watching an X-rated movie. circus act. I like it.
After grinding Josh’s cock to the point of delirium, Calvin positively explodes with semen It’s so cinematic how it shoots up like a fountain. Truly an extraordinary shot that should be framed in someone’s mansion somewhere.
Calvin then lies down next to Josh on the rug (“your turn, baby”), kisses him sweetly, and sucks his cock. Josh comes, covering Calvin’s lips with cum. Precisely at that moment a log falls from the chimney. Poetry.
I am a very Impatient porn watcher. I usually skip everything before the kiss. So this is a strong statement: Bree Mills‘The work is worth seeing in its entirety.
Bree Mills She’s a spectacular lesbian who makes smutty story-based porn. She’s basically my hero, and I dream of one day having an expensive drink with her in some beige hotel bar. she is one pioneer in the adult industry, the brains behind Girls, pure tabooand paralyzedand she’s delving into male gay porn now too (!!!). I love its sensitivity, focusing on story and mood without sacrificing genital close-ups. Never sacrifice genital close-ups.
It was by chance that I came across this scene from Mills’ film. real lesbian series, starring Frey Parker (oh really Sasha Gray vibrations) and Gizell Blanco. It takes 18 minutes to receive a kiss, but the 18 minutes are earned. What begins when one college student tutors another in math turns into a friendship, until one day, Freya admits that she has feelings for Gizelle.
Emotions naturally blossom as the actors move through the scene. It’s not like suddenly sticking out your boobs and exaggerated moans. You are welcome. They are shy kisses, tender caresses, loving eye contact. “How can I show you that you mean so much to me?” —Gizelle whispers. Like in a movie, Freya pulls her close and whispers, “like this.”
It is not cut in a forced or clumsy way. It’s fluid. It’s realistic. Yo believed he.
And when you believe it, cunnilingus is even hotter. Not that she needed any help, because Freya really knows how to lick pussy. It doesn’t just dive headfirst, but gently awakens the vulva. Then you hear the sound of their licking. Her clit is barely visible because her face is buried between Gizelle’s lips. It’s like the aesthetics of mainstream porn with the cunnilingus of independent porn. I’m obsessed.
They give each other blowjobs. They kiss. They make scissors. Gizelle climbs onto Freya’s leg while Freya looks at her with that sneaky sexual face I make whenever a beautiful woman is on top of me. Fingers never enter vaginas, because that’s not how this story would play out. The sex stays true to the story, almost as if the director’s boner doesn’t get in the way.
- And the crush of many: he even has his own. Fleshlight and dildo.